Crib tent to keep a child in bed?

A recent question from my twins group:

For those of you who have used crib tents, do you think they would work on toddler beds? Some nights my girls are up playing with each other until very late and I am trying to think of a way to keep them in their beds. Thanks

I don't think they would work to keep them in bed. You might be able to hook it up to discourage them from getting up, but I don't think it would be kid proof.

What about an incentive to stay in bed? They make fun themed bed tents for regular beds. There might be similar tents for toddler beds. If they stay in bed they get to use their tent; if not, you take it away. Good luck.

Unusual tastes: nature or nurture?

My daughter Ma’ayan wears boots with a connecting bar when she sleeps. She was born with bilateral clubfeet, but a series of casts, the first when she was only hours old, and an achilles tendon surgery have successfully corrected the condition. Her boots and bar help ensure that her feet do not revert to their original position (toes pointed in and the soles facing up). Originally, she wore the boots 22 hours a day. As she became more mobile, standing and walking without the boots served to correct and preserve the position of her feet, so she was allowed to wear them fewer hours a day.

Interestingly, Ma’ayan has not once complained about having to wear her boots. She only recently balked at wearing them when she formed a large blister on the top of her foot that broke and bled. We stopped using the boots to let her foot heal. We expected we might face resistance when it came time to start using them again, but she surprised us: Last week as we put her to bed, she told us her foot was better and asked us to put her boots on. Though she has spent as much of her life wearing the shoes as not wearing them, I suspect that even under these circumstances it’s still pretty unusual for a nearly three-year old to ask to wear them. But then Ma’ayan has always been a child of unusual tastes.

Ma’ayan will sit quietly through an entire meal and decline all food if it does not look appetizing. (In her world, whether something looks appetizing is directly related to the degree to which the item is bread, cheese, or carrots.) And she will not complain nor ask for food later. She has also cried to be put down for a nap – and not because she was sleepy. She simply wanted some time to sit alone in her crib in the near dark and “read” a book. Ma’ayan appears to recall nearly every piece of information ever said in her presence, but her immutability and lack of response to the calling of her name made me seriously question her hearing. (It seems to be perfect.) All I can do is wonder whether she is more stubborn mule or serene Buddha.

My father-in-law, a psychoanalyst, considers her sedate and contemplative tendencies to be the result of her casts and boots and bar. My husband and I, on the other hand, have thanked our lucky stars since nearly the beginning that her twin Hannah, a study in entropy, was not the one we had to get into lace up shoes with a bar. It’s likely that Ma’ayan’s nature is a combination of her genes and her circumstances, but I like to get at least as much credit as the boots for who she is.

Introducing utensils and keeping them from flying

A question from my local twins group:

What are good foods to use when introducing forks and spoons? My 16-month-olds love the concept of utensils, but are not yet good at actually getting any food into their mouths using them (it mostly ends up on them, the chair, the floor, etc.). We've had moderate success with pieces of French toast with forks and yogurt with spoons, but that is about it. Any tips on how to reduce the mess? What to do when they drop/throw their forks?

One thing you can try is to have a few forks on hand for each child. Load up some forks with whatever you're serving. Even things that don't require a fork, like pizza, nuggets, and grilled cheese, can be great practice foods. Let the kids take the pre-forked food and just practice getting it in their mouths. This can also be done with spoons, lined up on a plate.

Yogurt is always a disaster in the beginning. All I can say is put them in big bibs and take lots of photos. (The latter will seem much funnier in retrospect.) Lentils and other small beans make decent spoon foods. You do have to sweep afterwards, but it's not the whole yogurt scene.

Your kids will repeatedly get to see how you load up the forks and spoons. They'll want to try. With time, your help, and some luck, they'll learn. In the meantime, my husband got me a new dust buster for my birthday. This may not sound like a romantic present to you yet, but I trust it will.

Having several forks/spoons on hand helps keep accidentally dropped utensils from interrupting the meal. This is not only convenient, but it also makes dropped utensils less of a big deal for you, which (hopefully) will make throwing utensils seem less appealing to them. If one of my girls threw something, I gave a warning the first time, and the next time I turned the offender's chair away from the table. I made sure to ham it up with the other child, laughing, having a great time, and talking about how delicious the food was. As soon as the offender expressed dissatisfaction with being left out, I let it go 10-15 seconds, and turned the chair around again. I would say something like, "If you throw food again, I'm going to turn your chair around again." As they got older, I stopped the warnings and a second infraction meant the meal would end. It still happened (ok, happens!), but it has helped keep it somewhat manageable. Good luck!